December 2011
28 posts
I'm a bad girl.
I shouldn’t have but I went ahead and told PiC what She-who-must-be-obeyed told me on Saturday about him.  I had to.  To be stuck with information even as insignificant as this seemed wrong.  I hope he would do the same for me. 
Dec 1st
3 tags
Dec 1st
4 notes
November 2011
25 posts
2 tags
Nov 29th
2 notes
3 tags
Nov 27th
7 notes
3 tags
Big sigh.
I’m tired of this.  Of being alone, of wondering where I belong.  Tired of keeping all my real thoughts and feelings inside.  I want to be happy and feel like I’m part of something no matter how small.  I got to figure out what broken inside first. No, it’s true.  There is something missing or broken.  It must be.  Why else would I be so alone?  I keep missing something a cue or...
Nov 25th
2 tags
Nov 24th
2 tags
Nov 23rd
It's whatevs
johndarniellememes: but it is a little depressing when 70% of the posts on the mountain goats and john darnielle tags are about No Children and This year Those are the gateway songs.  Give them time and they will see the light so to speak.
Nov 23rd
10 notes
1 tag
Again with the thinking.
PiC sounded tired today.  Why didn’t I ask what was wrong.  I missed the damn cue again.  I’ll be thinking about it all night.  Fuck.
Nov 23rd
2 tags
It's all coming together.
For the last year I have been losing weight.  I started out at around 285lbs and as of today I am 219lbs.  Still heavy but not as bad as I was.  It’s coming off slowly but they all say that is the way to go.  The most exciting part of all this is clothing.  I am no longer struggling to find things that fit me.  When I was at my heaviest I was nearing a size in which I would have to order...
Nov 21st
I'm okay with that.
Last night someone asked me if I had a best friend.  It was a strange conversation to say the least but the question had me thinking.  I’m a very shy person in real life so its been hard to make friends since leaving school.  But then it hit me, My Partner in Crime, he’s my best friend right now.  Which makes me both happy and sad. Partner in Crime if you’ve read the other...
Nov 20th
I can't stop smiling.
Nov 18th
6 tags
Nov 18th
2 notes
2 tags
Never Quite Free
I’ve been listening to this song off and on for the last few days.  It has really helped my state of mind. 
Nov 16th
One of those days.
I’ve been off work for a few days because of a scheduling thing.  It’s not bad, I got all my hours but it has left me with a lot of time to myself.  Now I know that wouldn’t be bad for most people but for me it can be dangerous.  I spend a lot of time by myself as it is.  Right now I desperate for conversation.  I tried to chat with my mother but she wasn’t really into...
Nov 15th
4 tags
Nov 13th
4 notes
2 tags
Nov 11th
2 tags
Okay...
So according to people on another site I frequent if a guy constantly compliments your jewelry he’s either gay or he’s in to you. Awesome.
Nov 11th
6 tags
Nov 9th
25 notes
1 tag
Wait, what?
Apparently you are considered weird for buying extra small dog shirts for your favorite stuff animals.  I was told this by both of my sisters yesterday. Whatever.  Kila looks awesome in her new black skull t-shirt with the pink butterflies.
Nov 7th
4 tags
Nov 5th
10 notes
3 tags
A realization of sorts.
Today I realized that I will never have a need for a wedding dress.  It’s a really shitty thought I know but it’s the truth.  It’s slowly working in that I will be alone for the rest of my life.  Oh sure there will be family and some friends but a romantic relationship?  Not gonna happen.  Now I can here say ‘Oh you’re just being dramatic.’  Nope.  I am just one...
Nov 4th
4 tags
Nov 2nd
3 notes
Nov 2nd
1,271 notes
3 tags
NaNoWriMo
Yup.  It’s that time again, National Novel Writing Month.  I am toying with the idea of joining in.  I’ve been writing on and off for the last couple of months.  I get these idea stuck in my head and it’s the only way to get them out.  The problem is I don’t think they are very good.  Really just utter crap.  Total mary-sue adventures in my opinion. If anyone read them in...
Nov 2nd
5 notes